live alone and THRIVE

by Gwenn Voelckers

“Not in a million years did I think I’d be divorced and living alone at my age,” lamented the 47-year-old mother of two teen boys. “It’s been devastating, but I’m determined to regroup and get my life back on track.”

While living alone can be challenging, to be sure, it can also be a very meaningful and rich experience. With the right attitude and personal strategies, women and men alike can find contentment and joy in the solo life.

Inspired by the word “THRIVE,” I have spelled out six success strategies for living alone.

Think differently. Your beliefs determine the life you have. If you don’t like the results you are getting in your life, take a look at changing the beliefs that are producing those results. You have a choice. Choose to focus on your strengths, your gifts, and this unique opportunity to define what you want out of life.
Help yourself. When you live alone, you need to become your own “nudge,” your own motivator and cheerleader. Setting goals is a very effective way to give your life direction and purpose. They can put passion into everyday existence.
Rediscover and reconnect. A key to living alone successfully is to determine who you really are, without “shoulds” or other people’s agendas. Identify the activities that make you feel complete, as though nothing is missing. These are your “loves,” and when you live life consistent with these loves, you’ll feel energized and alive.
Invest in your future. Peace of mind and a sense of empowerment are the rewards for women (and men) who get their financial house in order. On your own or with help, assess your current financial standing, align your spending with your values, and maximize your emergency, retirement, and “dream” accounts.
Vow to banish negative thinking. Negative thinking will get in the way of your goal to feel better and to have the life you want. Discover and employ the tools that will help you let go of old ways of thinking, of a negative self image, of anger, or any other self-limiting thought.
Embrace the possibilities. You have an opportunity in front of you – an opportunity that many people may never have the chance to experience. On your own, you have a chance to fashion a life that fully reflects your dreams, your style, and your true self. It’s a gift, this time of rediscovery and renewal. Embrace it. When that happens, living alone becomes secondary to living fully!

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Gwenn Voelckers is the founder and facilitator of monthly workshops called, “Living Alone: How to Survive and Thrive on Your Own.” Designed for women who have experienced a divorce or the loss of a spouse, the workshop offers practical tools, advice, and hope for women who want to feel whole and complete on their own. For more information call (585) 624-7887.